There are two things I highly recommend doing if one has the chance.
The first is getting baptized.
And the second is having a wedding.
There are obviously very spiritual, meaningful and significant reasons why someone would choose to do either of those things, and those reasons are of supreme importance, yet there’s a different aspect of both that I feel like writing about.
Because at both my baptism this past weekend and my wedding several months ago, never have I felt more loved and valued than in those two instances. There’s simply nothing like embarking on an important moment in your faith and being able to look around and see many of the friends and family members that have helped to shape you into who you are. Likewise, and to an even greater extent, the feeling of beginning a journey with your spouse and having almost every person you love and cherish surrounding you, affirming you, and encouraging you is unlike anything else I’d ever experienced.
It seems like celebratory moments like these bring out stories, affirmation, and encouraging words that wouldn’t otherwise be verbalized. People telling you how much you’ve meant to them, how proud they are of you, etc.
But what if we didn’t wait until someone’s wedding to make them feel loved and valued in these ways? What if we intentionally created moments like these, not because it’s a birthday, wedding, or anniversary, but just for the heck of it?
Someday I would love to throw a surprise party for someone just to celebrate that person’s life and what their friendship has meant to me and others.
I’m incredibly grateful for the people in my life who have supported me and encouraged me as I’ve grown into the man that I am today. Unfortunately, far too many people have probably never experienced the kind of love and feeling of being valued that I’m talking about.
So, who can you encourage? Who should you tell how much they’ve meant to you? Don’t wait for a wedding. -CK
We spend most of our lives trying desperately to cut ourselves off from the pain we’ve incurred through different relationships, events, and past memories. In the midst of a break-up, divorce, disagreement, or hurt inflicted on us, we try desperately to put a tourniquet on the wound to stop the bleeding and try to move on and forget about it as quickly as possible.
And as time passes, we avoid the song that made us think of them, refuse to ever go back to that spot where the fight happened, and we separate ourselves from anything that reminds us of past hurt by all means necessary.
But what if, instead of running from those open wounds, as time passes, God actually desires for us to move toward the pain and the brokenness caused by these memories?
I confess that I have a dreadfully narrow view of redemption. So does the dictionary. One of the top definitions of redemption is “deliverance or rescue.” And this was all I thought it entailed for a long time.
That God would wash away my sins and take the good in me, or even the broken potential that He’s clearly put there but hasn’t quite lived up to the glory that He’s created it for, and He would use THAT to make me into who He intended and to glorify Himself.
But as usual, I have way too high a view of myself.
The beauty in redemption lies not in how God takes what’s seemingly “good” in us and makes it perfect, but that God would dare to get involved in our mess, and brokenness, and greatest weaknesses and pain, and that He would turn those things into something beautiful.
More than that, that He would choose to take some of the deepest areas of hurt in our lives, and some of our greatest shortcomings and turn them into our greatest sources of character and most significant strengths.
I’ve got a lot of junk in my life and plenty of moments in relationships that I’d rather forget. Things from college, things from high school, things from even as far back as grade school. But instead of hiding those things away somewhere beneath the surface, I choose to dig deeper, trying to figure out why it hurt and how it’s affected me, letting God into those wounds. Each and every person has probably gone through a multitude of things that have affected how we view God and how we view ourselves, and He longs to correct those things and move us closer toward who we were created to be.
We worship a God that wants to show off His power in our lives by entering into the darkest areas of our souls and creating strength and beauty out of something that was once weak and hideous. We just have to let Him go to work. -CK
When I decided to follow Jesus a little over six years ago, I was certain that a boost in self-esteem was supposed to follow. And it did for awhile. Roommates told me I looked happy all the time, I was filled with a confidence that came from finding significant things to devote my time and talents to, and I finally felt like I was someone who was wanted and valued within my community.
But the longer I’ve been a Christian and the more I’ve read the Bible, it seems as if the whole self-esteem thing was a myth. In fact, one could argue that following Christ actually results in less self-esteem.
Take Isaiah. Do you think that after experiencing God and His glory, Isaiah left that interaction being more confident of himself and sure of his character and abilities?
And the foundations of the thresholds shook at the voice of him who called, and the house was filled with smoke. And I said, ‘Woe is me! For I am lost; for I am a man of unclean lips, and I dwell in the midst of a people of unclean lips; for my eyes have seen the King, the LORD of hosts.’
About once a week, I find myself pretty humbled by my lack of ability as a musician, or as a writer, or athlete, or whatever. Why? Because when I experience people whose abilities and talents far outweigh my own, I realize just how short I fall and how incapable I am in the matter at hand.
So when Isaiah finds himself in the presence of, not just a man, but GOD, who is all-powerful, perfect, and "really really holy," his natural reaction is to feel “lost” or “ruined.”
It’s kind of like when I saw about 20 of the greatest living guitar players on the Experience Hendrix Tour and wanted to quit playing guitar afterward - only multiply that feeling by about a gazillion.
The Apostle Paul’s experience was evidently similar as he writes in Galatians, “If anyone thinks he is something when he is nothing, he deceives himself.”
My guess is, Paul didn’t get a lot of invitations at local high schools to be the featured motivational speaker. Thanks for the self-esteem boost, Paul!
And so I’ve experienced in life, that the more I see of God’s character and the more I experience Him, the more aware I am of my own sin and depravity. As Tim Keller says, “I am more sinful and flawed than I ever dared believe.”
But though these truths may deplete our earthly self-esteem, they also help us to see Jesus as more precious and valuable every single day. Because the greater our realization of our depravity, the bigger our view of the Gospel, and we’re also freed to fully put our trust and confidence in something much more significant.
Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded. Grieve, mourn, and wail. Change your laughter to mourning and your joy to gloom.
Humble yourselves before the Lord, and He will lift you up. –James 4:8-10
As God becomes more real in my life and makes His presence felt, He absolutely shatters any pride or earthly confidence I’ve been holding on to. If I’m honest, it can be a pretty depressing and crappy feeling.
But it forces me to find my identity and value in who God has created me to be and replaces all of the things in my life that have the appearance of value and self-worth with His love and affirmation.
As it turns out, there’s more to that Tim Keller quote.
“…And I am more accepted and loved than I ever dared hope.”
I don’t put much confidence in myself these days, but that – that, I will put my hope in.
-CK
Tonight’s election has a much different feel than the one two years ago when Obama was elected, yet for many people, there is still the same possibility of hope and change in the air.
Two years ago, I clearly remember thinking that I had never before seen a campaign that had inspired so much hope and so many expectations - something that seemed incredibly positive for our country and millions of people who had lost jobs and their life savings. And yet, as I write, much of America has grown tired of waiting for changes that never came and hope seems to have a distinctly red tint tonight.
Maybe I was wrong. Maybe hope and expectations that can never be fully met regardless of the political party or candidate is foolish. Maybe hope that has no foundation isn’t really hope at all.
I have no idea who the better candidate is, and I don’t think I care. They will do some things well, other things not so well, and several years from now, the majority of people will likely be voting for the candidate from the other party to try to meet their unquenched hopes and expectations.
But instead of being continually shocked, frustrated, and angry that our elected officials cannot satisfy our wants and desires, we have another option.
The author of the book of Isaiah was extremely familiar with the themes of suffering, hope, expectation, and justice. He writes over and over again that the people of Israel had put their hope in militaries, kings and rulers, politics, and proudly, themselves.
But as He usually does, God flips this on its head in chapter 49:
This is what the Sovereign LORD says: “See, I will beckon to the Gentiles, I will lift up my banner to the peoples; they will bring your sons in their arms and carry your daughters on their shoulders. Kings will be your foster fathers, and their queens your nursing mothers. They will bow down before you with their faces to the ground; they will lick the dust at your feet. Then you will know that I am the LORD;
Those who hope in me will not be disappointed.”
Don’t get me wrong. It’s great to vote and there are some really fantastic people out there who work in politics. But if our hope is found in our political parties, stimulus plans, and health care bills, we’re missing the point, and we will always be left disappointed.
Because there is only One hope that is completely worth our time, energy and affection, and only One hope that will not leave us disappointed. Father, Your Kingdom come! -CK
