There's a mournful heaviness that hangs in the air at a funeral for a loved one who has left us "way too soon." Not the kind of mourning that mixes tears of joy for a life well-lived with tears of sadness because that person is gone, but a soul-wrenching kind of mourning that laments unfulfilled expectations, is filled with regret, and wonders what to do next.
I would imagine that's kind of what Good Friday felt like for Jesus' followers - watching a young man in whom all of their hopes for freedom, political power, and the earthly reign of God hinged, be hung on a tree to die. Everything that they had devoted their lives to for the last few years was suddenly destroyed and the future that they had placed all of their chips on would never come to fruition.
And then came Saturday, perhaps the longest day of their lives. They'd had a chance to sleep on the fact that their "messiah" was dead, if they managed to sleep at all, and they had a full day to mourn, wrestle with God, and re-think the past three years. What could they have done differently? Where did they misread the signs? Now what?
I wonder if perhaps, as Peter and some of the disciples do at the end of the Gospel of John, each of the disciples went back to their previous ways of life that Saturday. Perhaps in an effort to get away for awhile and have some time to himself, Peter again took to fishing as he processed through what had happened and considered what his "back-up" plan for the future might be.
We know the end of the story, that at the end of this weekend, we celebrate Easter and Christ's resurrection from the dead. But I wonder if most of us don't live as if it's Saturday - living in the in-between of Christ's death and resurrection. We know the story of the Gospel, that Christ has died for our sins and that He has promised to return someday, but we hedge our bets as if the resurrection isn't actually going to happen.
We've all experienced placing our hope so fully on a potential job, our financial situation, getting into the school of our choice, having kids, a relationship, or something else, that when our expectations don't become reality, we're left identity-less and hopeless. As fishing was for Peter, these are our back-up plans, intended to give us meaning, purpose, and happiness in case this whole Jesus thing doesn't turn out to be what we expected.
But the Good News of the Gospel is that Christ is risen, He will come again, and our hope in Him is not in vain. We don't need "back-up plans" because God is faithful and His promises are true. We can confidently place all of our chips on Him, knowing that our hope is secure in Him and that because of the Cross, His love will never fail.
And though we will continue to experience the deeply painful loss of loved ones, of broken relationships, and unfulfilled expectations, there is hope - because though it is Saturday, and the time in-between Friday and Sunday will often be immensely difficult and painful, Easter is coming.
Happy Saturday.
-CK
"Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken." -Isaiah 54:10
